Percolating

13th June 2009

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Do You Belong In New York?

I found this out today thanks to Time Out New York:

DO YOU BELONG IN NYC?
Only until you age out.
Sorry to say it, but you’re a temporary New Yorker. Sure, this city is awesome for running around and enjoying your youth, but you came here to work and play hard and plan on jetting at the first signs of crow’s feet or when your parents stop financing that party lifestyle of yours. Plus, if you ever decide to settle down and have kids, there’s no way you’re bringing them up in a studio. Click here for suggestions about how to really enjoy NYC.

Do you belong in New York City?

Hard to say how accurate this is since it’s designed for people who are actually currently living in New York, so I had to pretend a little bit. But it makes sense since I may have already aged out and have never lived there longer than those three months in college. I wanted to live in New York to have a media career and live the idealized version of that. Now that that fantasy is proving to be a hard reality, and I’m no longer so sure about staying on the media career path, New York isn’t so appealing.

In fact, my California roots have started begging for more attention lately – I’m finding myself fantasizing about living on the beach. What?? I always said I could never go back there! And how to hold both my love of New York (still, love, love, love to go there, just not sure about wanting to live there all the time) and this new fascination with LA at the same time when they are pretty much the antithesis of each other? This quote from an New York mag article about Letterman and the new West Coast Conan sums it up:

“On one side – Los Angeles, duty, convention, comfort, brightness, professionalism, and the friendly smirk. On the other – New York, rebellion, innovation, elitism, darkness, self-sabotage, and the scowl.

I want some of both. I embody some of both. It’s pretty easy to prefer rebellion to duty, innovation to convention. But I really like comfort and brightness – perhaps to counteract my own propensity for internal darkness and self-sabotage. Why spend your life with a scowl on your face? I’d rather be walking down a sunny street with a smile. Or at least try to.

And what about where I am now? What would Portland’s version of those six characteristics be? If New York and LA are on opposite ends of the extreme, could Portland be some happy medium in the middle? Or maybe it’s off that spectrum entirely? I couldn’t stomach the plastic existence in LA for long, I know. But I also couldn’t handle the intense elitism and pretension of New York. Maybe Portland simply isn’t trying so hard and let’s everyone just be who and where they are in the moment. The problem is that if you’re not so sure of that, you’re not sure where to go and what to do in this city. And it doesn’t push you to figure it out. And that is the dilemma.

Maybe I could just travel all the time until I find the answer?

Tagged: lifeangstwhat to do with my life?New YorkLAPortlandNew York magazinequizTime Out New Yorkwhere?

10th June 2009

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NEW TODAY: Roller Skating | Street Walking (& CASA) | Cooking Thai(ish)

I’m in a rut. I’m not sure exactly what or how to change just yet, but I do know there’s a helluva lot of stuff I’ve never done. I’ve let myself get too comfortable, so I’m challenging myself to DO something new everyday. Most things will probably be small, maybe boring, maybe common place to everyone else, but hey, it’s new to me! Plus, I’m broke-ass. The *new* adventure of traveling the world will have to wait a few years. In the meantime, I’m collecting camera phone shots of every little thing for shits and giggles.

Here’s what started it:

Monday, 6/8/09

I was sitting in my orange chair Monday morning, staring off into space and wallowing in waaaaaay too much existential angst, when I realized I was actually staring at these roller skates, which have been sitting in their blue-and-white case since I bought them at a yard sale over a year ago. I haven’t once laced them up. And I thought, What the FUCK are you waiting for?? Stop waiting for just the right time, the right place, the right reason, the right preparation. Stop procrastinating living and just DO something already.

So I procrastinated all the to-do’s on my list instead and hit the streets. Damn, it’s not easy! Sidewalk cracks, sticks, rocks, freaking cars whizzing by… this is why they invented roller rinks. Plus the wheels on these vintage babies are rough, with sharp edges that are completely unforgiving. It felt like they might shatter to dust going over every bump. I ended up just circling around the parking lot by my apartment – not as fun as actually going somewhere, but it was super smooth. And jeeezus, I’m still sore! Yeah, I’m not in trithlete shape or anything, but it’s more like roller skating worked muscles that I don’t normally use, like my outer hips and thighs. I’ve got to get me some upgraded wheels and then I’ll be all about the 8-wheel workout.

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Tuesday, 6/9/09

I started training on Tuesday to become a CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate), so that’s definitely my something new for the day. But I also had to take the bus out to NE 70th & Halsey (and will be making that lovely trip twice a week for the next month). And I missed the stop and went too far. And I was early. So I spent about 15 minutes walking down the street, trying my best not to look like a hooker. Yep, that was new to me, too!

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Wednesday, 6/10/09

I never, ever, ever cook. This was the first time I used the stove for something other than ramen and tea since I moved in a month and a half ago. When I make dinner, the fanciest it gets is eating baby carrots out of the bag and microwaving a turkey burger patty. All I really do is snack all day long. And eat out a lot. Preparing a meal – thinking ahead about what to make, following a recipe, spending more than five minutes in the kitchen - is completely foreign to me.

But I do love food. Good food. I’m even finally shedding the picky eater habits and falling for things I always said I hated. Case in point: Thai food. Especially anything with peanut sauce. I’m absolutely addicted. So I looked through the stack of recipes I’ve torn out of magazines with the idea that maybe one day I’ll actually turn into a cook, and look: I made my own! Yeah, I used a sauce mix, but damn if I didn’t time that rice perfectly, chop up the chicken, add broccoli to the recipe, and really, really love spending time in the kitchen. Might I possibly like cooking? I think so… I’ve just got to cut recipes in half or I’ll be buried in leftovers – or invite people over to share! Guests will be welcome as soon as I get a dining room table and don’t have to eat on my bed anymore. Studio living…

Tagged: angstdo something new everydayexistentiallifenewroller skatesroller skatingcookingfooddinnerThaipeanut saucekitchenrecipesCASAwalkingbus